O Death, Where is your sting?

Today is my Uncle Steven Carl Hicks’ first heavenly birthday. He entered eternal rest Aug.28, 2021.

Today in church we sang these words from an opening song
“Christ is risen from the dead
We are one with Him again
Come awake, come awake!
Come and rise up from the grave
Oh death! Where is your sting?
Oh hell! Where is your victory?”

As I sang tears streamed down my face as I both grieved my Uncle’s death and rejoiced in the truth of this song. In these tears I had simultaneously much needed pent up grief released and yes also joy.

Later during the service we sang the hymn, “Come Thou Fount”

The tears constantly flowed as I sang the words of this hymn we sang at my Grandma Arlene’s memorial. You see it was at this very memorial Unc stood up before his family and proclaimed fervently the truth that is proclaimed in that hymn. He knew this truth. It transformed him. His life changed dramatically and he yearned for all of his family to have this same hope and joy.

So today it felt as if Uncle Stevie, and Grandma (Memaw) , my two faith giants were smiling from heaven while I sang out through tears and sometimes choked through this resounding truth:

“Jesus sought me when a stranger
Wandering from the fold of God
He to rescue me from danger
Interposed His precious blood

Oh, that day when freed from sinning
I shall see Thy lovely face
Clothed then in blood washed linen
How I’ll sing Thy sovereign grace

Come my Lord, no longer tarry
Take my ransomed soul away
Send Thine angels now to carry
Me to realms of endless days

Oh, to grace how great a debtor
Daily I’m constrained to be
Let Thy goodness like a fetter
Bind my wandering heart to Thee

Prone to wander, Lord I feel it
Prone to leave the God I love
Here’s my heart, oh take and seal it
Seal it for Thy courts above
Here’s my heart
Oh take and seal it
Seal it for Thy courts above”

And as if God through His tender, comforting Holy Spirit reached into the recesses of my grieving heart and said, “I know it hurts sweet Shelly and I am here.”

Something’s Missing

The star is missing atop the tree

And that Christmas village didn’t appear

There was something off about Christmas

Something was missing this year

I could blame being busy

but that was not the truth

What is missing this Christmas

What is missing is you

So it was hard to get started

To put up the tinsel and the tree

But I know there is joy despite the grief

And Christmas is the very reason for hope

So I dwelled on that truth to cope

And decked the halls and the mantle

And set out the advent candles

But despite my intention

Despite my peace

That star didn’t make it atop the tree

And so this year our tree top was bare

No angel or star placed up there

But it waxes poetic because my heart

This Christmas was missing a great star

But the hope of Christmas that rings true

Is where the stars and angels and newborn Savior abides

That is where my missing Christmas star is for eternal life

Long game

Penned January 8, 2021

Tired and weary
Of all the division
Derision, overinflated opinions
This world is aching
My heart is breaking
Why do we keep taking
When we need to be giving
Forgiving
Living for the Light
Darkness stirs the pot
Sits back and watches
Smiling and tapping his fingers together
Cause right now he is winning
What he doesn’t know this fight is not just beginning
Been going on since the dawn of time
The Maker’s got his own divine plan
Love has been drowning out hate since time began
Hate screams louder
Love is more subtle
But after all the drama boils down to a bubble
Love endures
Secures
Ensures
Just when Darkness closes in
One spark from Hope
Reveals LOVE wins
Again and again and again

Planted by streams

Water sustains life.

We are mostly water.

We need water.

We drink cheap substitutes. Not cheap in cost but cheap in value.

Our body needs pure water that contains natural minerals found in the earth that help our bodies perform and heal optimally.

Water is essential for life.

There too is water for the soul.

Midnight Train

Train whistles at midnight

I’m on some distant shore

Though it’s my first encounter

Seems I’ve been here before

Her whistle is a warning

It’s a beacon and a wail

She spent all her life yearning

Up and down those rails

She took a break at one

But she’s back before the 7th bell

And here comes another stranger

Maybe he’ll prove a friend

Unaware of impending dangers

Supposing it won’t end

But the lines fade

And.the hairs grey

And the memories stay

Another day comes with the sun

But even if you run

Backwards or forwards or in circles spin

Even if that gold loaded ship comes in

Time won’t relent and she won’t take you back

So you just keep whistling your lament down the track

Welcome to Tombstone, AZ

San Jose House: This historic site built in 1879 is noted as Tombstone’s first boarding house. It is one of the town’s oldest structures. It has appeared in movies and boasts former guests such as Wyatt Earp, Doc Holliday, Batt Masterson, and  Josephine Marcus

Our late night arrival into Tombstone made the 1879 San Jose House our introduction to the town. We were welcomed by the chilly desert night and a warm and cozy Wyatt Earp “suite”.
This mini apartment opens to an inviting queen bed for weary travelers, a kitchenette, a restroom with a shower to the right and in the back of the flat another room with a second queen bed. Bear in mind this is an old building and the main form of transportation did not have motors, so current travelers in the front room will hear the passing of cars along the main road.

The beds are moderately comfortable. The place is very clean and the accommodations are simple but inviting and very budget friendly. It truly appeals to these lovers of history. For the Huckaby 3 after 13 hours on the road from San Antonio to Tombstone, this cozy abode was the next best thing to home.

December 2- this and that

Reflections on Malcolm Guite’s Waiting on the Word December 2 excerpt:

Guite introduces us to Grevel Lindop’s poem, The Moon. As Guite discusses Lindop’s poem captures so beautifully in words the reality of time, memories. Something so valuable and precious like jewels but unable to quantify. These precious moments given to us first by our Creator and then by those we share the memories with cannot be fully captured so at best we poets and writers hope to take glimpses of the beauty and preserve it for others in verse or prose.

With the recent losses this past year including my Daddy and my dear Uncle Stevie the value of precious memories has been truly realized. I am thankful for some social media posts and some snapshots that captured some recent precious moments. I am very thankful my Uncle Stevie wrote some memoirs. We have his thoughts captured on paper to hold onto. These memories are likely underrated by the author at the time, but it is priceless to the author’s loved ones. My Uncle was not a writer by profession or hobby, but I am so glad he shared his thoughts. I encourage anyone reading this to do something similar. You have no idea the treasure it will be for your family some day. It has encouraged me to really stop putting my writing on the back burner or low on the priority list. There is always more to do.

I love to write so why would I deny myself the opportunity to do so? The aforementioned time issue, putting everyone and everything else first , and perfectionism. Yes, because I don’t have eloquent pearls of words strung together for the moment I feel I should say nothing. However all the advice from authors states the first and foremost thing to do is just write. Write often. In the process the jewels will come. There will be many diamonds in the rough and many a lump of coal. However you can’t get to the pearls without the rough stuff to smooth the edges.

Thus here I am absolutely exhausted, worried about a couple of sick family and overwhelmed by a full calendar, but I have chosen to write this. To reflect on this morning’s Advent reading, to just get these thoughts out and hopefully clear some space for some future beautiful work to blossom.

So let me conclude this therapeutic goulash with a prayer

Heavenly Father, Creator of Light and Order ,

I humbly beseech you to heal my nephew James, my brother Louis and all of those whom are on my prayer list. Lord Jesus, you are the Great Physician. Heal them. Meet all their needs according to your riches Christ Jesus. Give us peace as we wait for healing. Give wisdom to those entrusted with their care. Help me to lay my loved ones at your feet. As much as I love them, you love them more.

Lord helps us during this advent season not only to seek you for what you do and can do for us but just who you are. Let our communion with you , the Light of the World be enough

Thank you for overcoming the darkness, defeating death and offering life to your beloved. Help us use that life for your glory.

Lord Jesus heal baby James. Heal his foot. Protect him from side effects from his treat and let him grow strong in wisdom, stature and knowledge of you, our Lord so he may carry out your perfect will for his life. What the enemy meant for evil Lord use for good. Lord let James walk tall and strong all his days as he leads others to follow you.

Restore function and feeling to my brother’s face. Cast out the illness from his body. Heal his mind, body, and soul. Let him rise up so he may walk in renewed strength to continue the ministry you have called him to.

Lord thank you for the healing in Rhonda. Thank you for giving me and other friends of hers the story of Lazarus as she was on our hearts. Though she was intubated and her heart stopped for 6 minutes , you Lord Jesus told her Rise up , come out of your death clothes. Thank you and praise you that she is communicating again and will soon go from ICU to a rehabilitation unit to become stronger. Thank you for not letting Covid overcome her body.

Lord we pray for all those whose loved ones healing was not what they prayed for but the ultimate healing. Comfort them as they mourn. Lord help me and my family continue in our grief journey that we cling to our true hope, that we honor you and him as we carry on his legacy.

Lord help me to continue to prepare my heart for what you would have me learn and don’t this advent season. And since I have never asked this, Lord you gave me the passion and talent for writing now I pray that you bless it so I may fulfill my will and bring you glory.

In the powerful name of Y’shua Ha Mashiach- Amen

From Darkness to Light

Reflections after reading the December 1 excerpt from Malcolm Guite’s Waiting on the Word

I contemplate the paradox of our lives born into darkness and yet light. We are in darkness as we are void of knowledge or understanding about the world, our Maker, and even ourselves. We are in light as we are created in the Imago Dei. The Great Light is our Creator and we are made in His image and likeness. Enter in the will.

We are created on purpose, with a purpose and a divine plan for that purpose. We are created by a Maker that designed us for relationship with Him and our fellow creatures. Since we cannot be forced to love or else it is no love at all and because our Maker did not want mere robots we are given a will and the ability to choose. We choose wrongly thus darkness enters.

Despite the darkness of our sin there is that spark of the Imago Dei that was deposited within us at our creation and it seems that very spark seeks to draw itself to even more light until we are face to face with the Light of the World. This first spark is what I think of in reading George Herbert’s poem The Glance. The first glance from our Maker was at our creation. However the moment our will goes against God, it leads us into the hiding as Adam hid. In regard to this hiding as Guite notes in regards to Herbert’s poem there is this tension between hiding and seeking. There is this conflict between darkness and light.

The good news is this:

The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it

John 1:5

After reflecting upon Guite’s discussion of Herbert’s poem, I recalled a vivid image the Lord revealed to me that inspired the poem I penned below. The image was a dark canvas if you will that stretched as far as the eye could see. There were pin pricks of light breaking through. Then there were punches that allowed even more light. The pin pricks were glimpses of God and the punches were gazes. Discovering Herbert’s poem entitled The Glance thrilled my soul as I saw this common thread of Truth that predates the glimpses granted to me by the Holy Spirit.

Canvas of Truth

When I consider the stars
Dark infinite canvas
Glimpses of light
Glimpses of truth
Piercing the night

And then
Something is torn
Pain rips a hole
Yet through that pain
Greater light shines through
Not a glimpse, but a gaze
Of light
Of truth
Piercing the darkness

In time
Truth adds to truth
Even darkness becomes light
Basking in the truth
Of this canvas’ Creator

It is interesting and most consistent with what I know of our Lord that those gazes seem to accompany the hard seasons. In my youthful naivete I would likely have been tempted to forgo the gazes to prevent the accompanying pain. My flawed almost superstitious thinking was if I don’t see the gazes then nothing bad will happen to those I love. The reality is we live in a fallen world where pain and darkness exist, but our loving Creator gives us these gazes to sustain us through the pain.

This brings to mind a conversation I had with my Daddy about life and death. I thought it peculiar that every time a baby was born it was near a death in the family. I confessed my dear to my Dad. “I think babies are wonderful Daddy, but it makes you not want any to come so you don’t have to give up someone you love.”

Dad pointed out that my thinking was not in order. “No , Shelly it’s the other way around. Death will come. Those who pass on will leave, but God gives us new life in babies to show hope still lives.” [God is faithful as we bid Daddy farewell to his heavenly rest in July we welcomed my nephew James Knox this October. ]

Which brings us inadvertently to our advent theme. The darkness was in the world, but the light would not be overcome. So our Great Light, our Creator, Maker ,Elohim, Yahweh, Jehovah, Heavenly Father, The Great I Am saw fit to send us a baby that would not only show us hope lives despite death and darkness, but this very baby would defeat death.

Oh Christ child what a glorious gaze of light. That we may gaze upon your face and you gaze into ours so we may fully know and understand how loved we are by you. So in the darkness of advent we wait expectantly for the Hope that is the Light of the World.

Come Lord Jesus, Come