Author: sillypoeticnurse

A silly poet, writer, Nurse Practitioner, wife, and mom always looking for a way to share hope.

Mercy Triumphs


We think we all know the truth
But the truth knows you
And we are only guessing
Answers to questions
And we fill in the gaps
To feel less trapped
To satiate, placate, compensate
We want to relate
But we can’t truly state
That we don’t know
Cannot know
What is mystery
Want to burn that down
Drown it out
Explain it away
Killing the truth along the way
I read and I heard
You’re wrong
You read and you heard
My thoughts are absurd
And the whispers want us in despair
To think this goes nowhere
To think hope is lost
That we can’t afford the cost
And the kingdom and its treasures
Were only for them anyway
Not for you
You’re not chosen
You’re just too broken
You’re just cannon fodder
In a war of gods and politicians
Forget truth , throw out traditions
Nothing matters , no one cares
That’s the lie they serve
And the deceiver is convincing
We drown in our sorrow and shame
Forget the one who knows our name
Who places his claim
Cause they twisted the truth
And said it’s not for you
The lies they weave
And we believe
Too easily
Because we know what we’ve done
But the truth is real
Slowly revealed
And it’s not wearing crown jewels
And it doesn’t get first bill
Not winning plastic trophies
Or making dollar bills
So don’t listen to the masses
They are just as broken as you
Don’t listen the headlines
That say the sky is falling too
Here’s a little secret they won’t tell you
It’s been falling all this time
And yet we’re fine
Cause there is a truth
That drowns out lies
Capsizes fear
Defeats despair
And it does not discriminate
It does not hate
It rescues
It renews
It resurrects
Restores
Hope is alive
Cause hope was born
Before we ever came
Before we had a name
So tune out the lies
And the egotistic
Narcissist
Chest beaters that say they know
Look to see the truth being shown
Love being grown
Life being sown
Lost coming home
Mercy being shown
Because justice reigns
But Truth and Love proclaims
Mercy Triumphs!

©2024 Shelly L. Hickaby

Letting Go in 2024???

One of the hardest things for me to “let go” of is my expectations and desire to please and do everything. I cannot do everything, even all that I want to do. I have to accept my limitations. Those limitations can be time, finances, conflicting duties, or even a need to just rest. This weekend I wanted to do two different things. I knew they both could not occur. Some things came up and I missed one thing, so I was hopeful to make the other. The potential winter weather , the duties to prep for that and some other duties because my husband is away for the weekend means not only did I miss the one thing, I missed the other thing too. I kept trying to find a way I could make it happen. I could try, but it was not realistic. So I missed two very good things this weekend. God is using this time for me to accomplish some other less glamorous, but necessary tasks. I have some downtime with just me and my daughter as well. There is a laundry list (pun intended) of things needed doing that I also am getting done because I had to miss the 2 things.

Sometimes letting go of expectations is the hardest thing. I had one expectation of what this weekend would be. That did not happen. Plan B didn’t either. I am making an effort to learn to be content no matter my situation. So first, I will lament missing the things, otherwise just pretending it’s ok is not true to the situation or myself. Then I will carry on with the things that lay before me and find the sparkles of joy and pearls hiding in the muck of errands and housework, because they are there. So here’s to letting go in 2024! First stop is the hardest – letting go of expectations. If I can keep up with this letting go theme this year , it should be an interesting ride around the sun!?!?! You game??

Sometimes in life it may feel as though we are drowning… overwhelmed by life’s trials and demands. Expectations from external forces not to mention your own internal forces. Raw emotions. Duties that collide. Physical, mental and emotional exhaustion are likely results of prolonged stressors. I am so thankful that God includes this scenario in His Word. I can so relate with the disciples right now. “Jesus, save me. I am going to drown.” They were not going to drown, but it felt like it. I love Jesus’ reply. “Oh you of little faith, why are you so afraid?” This may seem like criticism, but I see it more as a loving reminder. It reminds me of a scene in my life when my daughter was 4 years old. She was frightened by a storm. The loud thunder scared her. She was panicking. Now I love that sweet little girl of mine. In the midst of her panic I raised my voice a bit and said “Kyra, you are safe. It’s only a storm. I am here. Daddy is here. God is here. It is going to be okay.” It was no coincidence I was going thru my own storm at the time. Those words I spoke to my child echoed through my heart from my Lord. So even now….as the storm rages and I am sure I will drown. I cry out to. Jesus. When the disciples panicked, you know what he did next? He didn’t shame or smite the disciples. He calmed the storm. He may not calm my current storm, but when I cry out to him I know he can calm my storm of emotions. #stormsoflife #anchoredinChrist

Soul Poisoning

Fret- to be anxious or worry about, to gradually wear away by rubbing or gnawing.

What is gnawing at your soul, wearing away your peace and joy? An injustice? Unfair treatment? Frustration with the success of the wicked ? Frustration with those even closest to us who can’t seem to get that one thing right or understand? Frustration with ourselves because we keep messing up or can’t seem to get it right or get over something?

See how the prescription is given before the symptom here????
Be still and wait patiently…
Not just be still, be still before the Lord.
There is a great difference.
Stillness with ourselves leads only to further torment from our own voices , the inner critic, the accuser, and even our own vindicating pride that may be excusing our OWN actions by justifying them with, but we were wronged.

We are not called to vindicate ourselves. We are told to wait on God.

As we wait, still before the Lord- He will lead, guide, and heal. He will keep us from giving into self-righteous anger and wrath.
The balm that comes soothes those deep soul wounds if we wait for it. You see it is not a balm the surgeon , the world , or even our best intentions can attain or apply. It must come from the Prince of Peace who happens to also be the Great Physician.

What woes you? An unjust boss or ruler? An unjust world! A prodigal child that hasn’t realized they’re in the pit or better yet they do but are not ready to come out? Our own self condemnation?

Remember anger over any subject is a poison that is self administered and it is insidious and makes the soul sick but it often disguises itself as a sense of justice. There may be a just cause but there is a reason we are warned against anger. Do not allow yourself this soul poison.

Wait before the Lord…wait patiently
Then your healing will come like noonday.
His promises are true, but we are called to act in order to receive the benefit from them. Surrender…. lay it on the altar…set it at the foot of the cross and allow your soul to be healed and no longer rubbed away by worry …

Untold Story

There’s a story to tell

but it’s buried a few layers deep

it is a noble and worthy tale

but it is woven in a bundle of grief

i have contemplated

procrastinated

and even purposely evaded

but i know it wont let me rest

so at its behest

i must wade in

so i can begin

to tell it

Our Star Spangled Banner

Photo credit : Snoopygrams from the art of Charles M. Schulz

For me it has always stood for freedom and opportunity for all borne out of sacrifice.

This is my country
She is not perfect
In fact she has many flaws
But what she wanted all along
Was freedom and liberty for all
She had a rough start
Made mistakes along the way
Had to make changes
So EVERYone could get a say
She won’t sugar coat it
Some were excluded at first
That has left a lifelong scars
And it will take years to overcome the hurt
she knows the scar always remains
She hopes it keeps her from that mistake again
She wants to make her mission reality
That liberty and opportunity
Is for all in this land
And while we are given voices
And freedom to take stands
And promote or cause
And defend what’s right
She wants us all to know
We have to find that thing
That is worth the fight
That one thing that can unite
She is aching and bleeding
From the division and wars
When what she wants the most
Is together let us be kind
And in kindness show love to others

Salty Tears

Ocean calls me
Like she’s my home
But I only just met her
And yet I belong

Waves rushing in
To greet the boulders
Waiting on the shore
Welcomes strangers
Same as friends

Sitting on that rock
Contemplating
Reminiscing
Dreaming
Seeking
Solitude and peace

Her icy waters soothe
Burning desires
deep soul wounds
Salty spray meets my tears
Been here a minute
Feels like years

Salt in my lungs
Water in my veins
Sun on my face
Here comes the pain

Quit holding back
Gotta let it out
Cry a sea of tears
Crashing waves of fear

Sand, sun, and sea
What a beautiful place
To make peace
With my grief

©️2023 sillypoeticnurse

Tears for Jerusalem

You wept over Jerusalem

Because they did not see

The grace that stood before them

The chance to be free

And the house of prayers

Became a den of thieves

You must weep for us now

Because we’re too blind to see

The grace offered to us all

The chance to be free

We prefer our cheap substitutes

We’ve murdered the mystery

We cling to earthly treasures

And have turned our back on Thee

Self sufficient but self has limits

Temporary pleasures of desire

Trying to warm ourselves in dying embers

Lost our touch with the Holy fire

So we bicker and fight and blame

We share so much doubt and pain

It’s more contagious than

The one hundred year plague

Despair corners us in and chokes

Out any last breaths of hope

And though I have not yet seen

the holy eastern land

I look on this land before me

And weep for my fellow man

Lord we need you

Wake us up

Too okay with sleeping

Or numbing pain with drugs

Lost our will to take a stand

Pain ain’t the only thing that’s numb

Our desire for justice for all

Our ability to discern the truth

On lies we sleep, slip and fall

We waste away our youth

Our lamp oil is running low

Wake us up from our slumber

Ready us, ignite our souls

Break this spell we’re under

Starting with seeds of doubt

self condemnation and ambitious gain

settling for counterfeit truth

Just to avoid temporary pain

Forgetting that for want of a horse

A kingdom can be lost not gained

Darkness has reared it’s head

And the headlines says evil wins

But Victory is still on the throne

It’s up to me to join in

Which side am I on?

Which side are you joining in?

Cause even the sidelines aren’t safe

And they are preying on our children

We have to stand up and fight

Or else we get sucked in

To the illusions of the night

And the labyrinths of our sins

All is not lost

But there is a cost

But a little pain

Is worth the gain

Of the precious lives at stake

Cause love alone is the final fight

and we have some ground to take